How To Recover From Burnout 3 No BS Strategies For Moms, Episode 164

February 7, 2023 / Melissa Llarena /

I’m burned out. Now, what? 3 lessons I learned on how to keep burnout at bay or to rescue myself because mental illnesses run through my family. Plus, what mom has time for burnout? As you listen to this episode, definitely be sure to grab my 10 burnout zappers for creative moms and pass them along to your mom friends too.

FREE RESOURCE: 10 Burnout Zappers For Creative Moms – Unexpected and (several playful) ideas to avoid getting too burned out (or to zap it quickly) so that your imaginative, playful, and expansive thinking self can create something glorious today!

https://form.jotform.com/230355756860158

My identical twins didn’t sleep through the night until eight months in. That was the same year that I lost a loved one to cancer and that my mom was in a hospital due to being poisoned by a collage of psychopharmaceuticals. It was a devastatingly overwhelming year. I write about this situation in my upcoming book called Mom Life Rescripted: Reawaken your imagination, reintroduce playfulness into your life, and stretch your thinking. While everyone around me thought I was crazy, it was important to me to exclusively nurse my twins as I did my eldest. It so important that without my imagination awake even during those sleepless nights I could NOT have figured out how to spend time away from the twins to go to funerals and a psych ward while keeping my promise to my boys. Let’s be clear. I’m NOT passing judgment on you if you didn’t make the same decision or couldn’t. This is just my experience and one of the several moments in my life when burnout entered my mom life. So how did I cope with all of the burnout that I felt as a mom during a terrible year?

Here are the three lessons that I wish to teach you:

1-Ask AMBITIOUSLY for help – If you secretly wish you could wave a magic wand and have a meal delivered, your home cleaned, and someone else to hold your boob at your child’s mouth then I encourage you to sincerely make the biggest ask of your entire life without any shame so you can begin your burnout healing journey right now. Back then, I asked my friend with her own twins to donate me her stockpile of milk. Do you know those styrofoam tubs? Yep, she brought her milk to my doorstep.

2-Pay 100s of dollars for a cab to see the doctor for yourself – That year the cherry on top was me developing pneumonia because we were also buying a house that year. The mortgage paperwork took me over the edge. I was in such a state that I was coughing and peeing and my lung hurt so much so that I had to suck it up. Hop in a cab for an hour to my original family physician who went on to tell me, Melissa, this is the real deal. You may not be unwell in a physical sense but if you are burned out then find an escape for a night or weekend to regroup your emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Not all illnesses are visible.

3-Pick one interest that lights you up – Stop f*cking yourself up like DJ Esther say in an interview. In my book, I share her story and how she fell ill after neglecting herself during a family crisis. Your body doesn’t give a shit if you have a good reason for running yourself ragged. You aren’t going to be given a pass because you neglected yourself to care for a parent or child or partner. All intense events are equal opportunity and the path back out of burned begins by finding ONE thing that you enjoy —- small or large and doing it.

SHARE this episode with a mom who enjoys reading nonfiction and/or is writing her own.

Similar Resources:

How To Not Give A F*ck About Whether You Belong Nor Whether You Should Be The One Playing Tupac From The DJ Booth, Meet DJ “Your Mama” Esther Goedvolk, Episode 66

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-not-give-a-f-ck-about-whether-you-belong-nor/id1308269140?i=1000514052363

https://form.jotform.com/230355756860158

*Credit for the tree image: Lauren Witte/The Texas Tribune

Join my Substack newsletter:

Unimaginable Wellness Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

https://melissallarena.substack.com

Grab your FREE chapter of my upcoming book entitled: Mom Life Rescripted: Reawaken your imagination, reintroduce playfulness into your life and stretch your thinking

Here’s the link: https://www.melissallarena.com/waitlist/

In the FREE chapter, you will instantly receive, get ready to:

See how I rewrote the “mom scripts” I inherited as a second-generation Latina who was raised to assume that becoming a mom was akin to a dream death sentence; can you relate?
Be taken back to the days when you were free to be whoever the heck you wished to be; watch how I relived my glory days so you can do the same without having to run away from your home to join the circus
Get a jolt of energy to reclaim your former free and spirited self into this season of your life as you continue to explore your interests as seriously as you do those of your school-age kids; uncover how to bring back your ambitious self today and have the energy to execute too

Meanwhile, check out what moms like you have to say about this chapter and my upcoming book overall! Get your free chapter today! Don’t you want to feel alive again? You know who raises happy kids? Happy moms. So here is what other moms have to say…

This chapter is about getting in touch with your creative, playful, imaginative side. The part of yourself that perhaps felt freer before you became a parent, before you chose your identity and had a lot of responsibilities weighing you down. In helping you get in touch with your more playful, creative self, it not only helps you on a path toward greater happiness and fulfillment, but it also helps you to feel more fulfilled as a parent. – Mom/PR

The words: imagination, play and fun are not the usual things we as mothers think of when wondering how to get a grip back on our career and I believe it provides a really fresh take and lots of food for thought for mothers reading it. I think that the tone is so energetic and fresh that it is why I would pick it up. – Latina Mom/Positive Psychology Coach

Melissa is a mom of three with big dreams who tells it like it is. She draws on her own experiences and the experiences of professionals she’s interviewed for her podcast to reflect on the plight of the mother. How do women conform to or challenge the traditional “mom script”? If you’re a mom, what can you do to break the “cultural glass ceiling” to be yourself and a great parent, all without having to force yourself into a mom mold that doesn’t fit you? Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours. This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. – Aspiring Novelist, Librarian, Mom To Two Kiddos

For moms like me, the pandemic was an opportunity to re-evaluate and course-correct things in our lives we weren’t thrilled with. Coming out of this period, sluggish yet motivated, so many of us can use this book to help us wake up! If you’re looking to refresh, reenergize, and yes, reimagine a better version of your life, this book is for you. I loved the hilarious, yet poignant stories about motherhood today and the window into the world of those who’ve gone for it – and did it. – Mom In A Biracial Relationship Who Left A Corporate Career

In her book, Melissa shows us that motherhood does not have to be a pause or an end of your pre-child self. With guidance from her podcast guests, she encourages us to think big, find what lights us up, think big, and move towards our goals with the steps that fit the reality of our lives as they are today. In doing so we honor and inspire our child(ren), and our own inner child. – Single Mom To A 12-Year Old Boy

Go to www.melissallarena.com/waitlist

Subscribe and Review The Podcast!

Have you subscribed to my podcast for moms who read and want to write a nonfiction book? I’d love for you to subscribe if you haven’t yet.

I’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms.

Let’s follow one another on Instagram! Say hi. Let me know if you learned something new in this week’s episode.

https://www.instagram.com/melissallarena

Loving this content? Join other moms like yourself on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/bePatron?u=30901620

Interested in supporting this podcast? Visit my Patreon page for juicy insider details.

Connect With Me

Posted in Podcasts

Melissa Llarena

Melissa helps movers and shakers up to those in the corner office rediscover what makes them unique so that they can land their dream job in a forward-thinking company where their ideas are listened to, valued, and supported.

She brings insights from having worked in 16-business units (including Human Resources) in NY, Paris, and London. Additionally, in her former corporate career, she worked on billion-dollar brands for P&G and on IBM for Ogilvy & Mather. Later, as the founder and CEO of Career Outcomes Matter, Melissa created a 3-step “sellable strengths” process which has been the centerpiece of her clients' results.

Melissa applies this method consistently to support mid-level professionals up to the c-suite to get into Fortune Global 500 organizations and agencies. She studied Psychology at NYU and earned her MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth.